Wrestling with Worry

"Worry is a mild form of ATHEISM."

As you all probably know, my biggest sin I am working through is my worry. I have many verses posted around my house that remind me to simply trust, yet it is a daily struggle. When I was younger it was really bad. I went through waves of worry so intense that I was crippled by them. I wouldn't eat or sleep for fear of choking or dying. I was so terrified of germs I'd wash my hands until they bled. With God's guidance and through the amazing and persistent efforts of my parents, I was able to beat those extreme tendencies. I remember the day I got so nervous in church that I started to pass out. I had to sit down. My mom grabbed me by the arm and marched me to the youth pastor's office. She pulled out the biggest concordance I'd seen and she watched me write out verse upon verse about worry, fear, and peace. I kept those scraps of papers for years, such a comfort to pull out and refer to. Recently Matt and I have been really praying for our futures and where God would like us to be. Because of the unknown factor, my worries have resurfaced. I am at a much better place in my life and my relationship with MY GOD now that I am older, yet this afternoon I needed to do the same thing that my mom had me do as a ten year old kid. I looked up those verses. Many have been committed to memory by now, yet I wanted to see them, to actually look at the words and claim them. I turned on my pandora station and my ears were flooded with the encouraging words of Chris Rice, Kari Jobe, Selah, Fernando Ortega, Watermark, Keith and Kristyn Getty, Jadon Lavik, etc. As I sang along to the truths in their lyrics, I searched the Bible for those verses of promise. Praying and seeking Him, I found peace this afternoon. Now in a matter of moments I am sure a worry will resurface, and I will remind myself of His control and guiding hand on my life. I will seek out those verses and be reminded of those promises. During my pondering and praying I thought of all the mental images I get when I consider peace. So many images flashed in my mind's eye, laughter, images of a child with her Father. After a few minutes on google, I found the many images I had pictured. In a few quiet minutes I produced a collage on my computer to be my new background, a constant reminder of the peace I find in my Father.



May I keep my eyes on HIM and not the worries around me.